Meet Your Goddess
I approached this assignment by first finding a goddess meditation to practice with online. The evening I tried it I ended up meeting the goddess. My sacred place in my astral world is a girls’ camp I counseled at up in Fishkill, New York. The place has a small pond, with a grassy dike that keeps the pond water in. The pond is surrounded by trees and in my astral world there are paths to different magical areas. In this meditation, I began standing at the top of the dike and looking up at the stars. As I looked down to the pond she was standing by the edge spinning gently. Her clothing was iridescent and a pale milky white. I went down to talk with her and noticed that the cloth was sprinkled with crystals and twinkled like distant stars above. I could see her tanned body through the clothing, specifically noticing her breasts. When I made eye contact with her I was given her name, Anu Mari. She smiled at me secretly and began spinning again. I knew it was time to go.
During the goddess meditation I did with Robin, we each read the meditation to each other during the Snow Moon, between the time of the eclipse and the comet. In my meditation, I again approached Anu Mari. The water edge she stood beside was the edge of the ocean with cliffs in the distance. There was fog draping over the land and you could feel the mists touching your skin. The stone I sat on had spirals etched into it and was about two feet tall. It was weathered and ancient. When I sat down, she handed me a crystal-looking object that looked like the Waterford Times Square New Year’s Eve ball. I saw the duplicate ball on display at the Waterford Factory in Ireland in 2001. When she placed it in my hand, it began moving and opening like a lotus flower. It gave off its own internal light. After she gave me the object she faded away and I knew it was time to return.
When I returned home, I researched what Goddess had the name Anu Mari. I found that there is a Basque goddess with the name Mari that lives in a cave and creates storms with her consort. She is over fertility of the land and has been given the title of “Lady Justice.” The Celtic goddess Anu is the Irish mothergoddess of the Tuatha de Danaan, the pantheon of gods I follow as a Druid. There are two hills near Killarney in Ireland called Da Chich Anann or “the two breasts of Ana.” What is interesting is that I have been to Killarney, Ireland and just south of the Basque region in Spain. I also have ancient ancestors from each of these countries, so I wonder if there is also a genealogical connection of worship to these two goddesses.
The Wild Hunt & the God
The Wild Hunt ended up being active visualization for me. It was easy to get into a meditative state but the activeness of it kept me very shallow in my meditative state. I remember the horn blowing was very loud, like the Horn of Gondor in Tolkien’s Lord of the Rings when they warned the orcs were approaching. The man that came to me was riding a silver-grey horse. He had dark pants on but no shirt. His chest was furry, like a Scot and he had jet black hair that was long to his waist and slightly wavy. I didn’t see his face since he pulled me up and was behind me on the horse. At one point as the ride occurred, I felt more at one with the horse and forgot there was the man behind me. I felt the darkness around me, rather than saw it. The wind blowing against my face as the horse ran was what made an impression. Exhilaration as we raced ahead toward the rising sun filled me. The land that was shown to me was not local, instead it was the rolling hills of Ireland. I think the local countryside became a genealogical connection of what my soul recognized, rather than the here and now. Upon facing the crone I was pulled towards the mound, but she smiled and told me “Not yet,” touched my forehead, and I was no longer there.
Explanation of Relationship to the Goddess and God
My relationship with the Goddesses and God seem a little deeper than before. This closeness reminds me of the relationship I had with the God when I participated in our Druid Order’s Great Rite in May 1997. At that point the god was Taranis, a god I have frequently interacted with over the past 20 years. Yet, it seems like my relationship took a step up from where I have existed as a priestess. The Goddesses and the God that approached me in these meditations were higher in ancestry of the gods, more ancient than the ones I frequently work with. Therefore, a deeper connection has occurred through these meditations.
This deeper relationship should prove interesting, since I have deepened my faith in my Druidic practices. I believe that the more ancient connection will allow me to work to the betterment of the students I teach and guide. To have a connection to a Celtic Goddess from Spain gives me the opportunity to show future students that you do not need a Celtic background or have Celtic deities connect with you as a Druid. While this has been a common practice in Druidism, because many groups cleave to Druids as Celts and call only Celtic deities, I believe that Druid beliefs stem from across Europe. My personal connection will help provide a personal example.
The deeper relationship with the God, though not named in this meditation, helped me reconnect to the horse, my personal totem connected to my magical name. The rhythm of the hoofs felt like a heartbeat, the core of my being. I belief his reminder is a message to me to remember to care for myself as I guide others. I also believe that I may need to revisit him in this meditation to remember the practice and gift of reconnecting for my own energetic and magical needs.